Cover image via
No Money Lah by Yi Xuan (Facebook)
& Johannes W/Unsplash
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On Monday, 22 November, the 27-year-old, who runs a blog called No Money Lah where he often talks about his finance journey and personal growth, penned a Facebook post that has since been shared over 46,000 times.
In it, he shares how life goals have changed in some ways between generations.
“Isn’t it crazy that at this age, many of our parents were already getting married, more so bringing us to this world? On the flip side, today, many of us are still struggling to get a hold of ourselves in our late 20s.
“Forget getting married or buying a house by 30. I am blessed if I can take care of myself already!”
“For the longest of time, I find it extremely hard to express my fears and worries in words. Why? Because by the norms, the age ’30’ is such a unique milestone of life.
“Getting married. Buying your first property. Being financially stable and well-paid. Having all the answers.
“Be it from the norms, social media, or ourselves, I am sure many of us are carrying some form of expectations as we transition towards 30,” he writes.
While many of his peers are busy getting married, buying a house, and etc, he wonders what he’s doing being single and “not achieving anything significant in life so far?”
“I have never felt so uncertain before. What if I picked the wrong career path? What if I fail in my pursuit, and have to start all over again at/after 30? Can I compete with the younger lads by then?”
“I feel angry. Why, after putting so much time and effort in my work, I am still not achieving anything significant in life?
“Am I missing something? How much more do I have to do before things start to turn in my favour?”
“[The] urge I felt to do more, the less productive I’ve become. No joke. Getting married, buying a house and car, building a family — all of these require money.”
These worries make him feel like he needs more time and questions how others seemingly juggle it all.
“SERIOUSLY. How are the people around me balancing their work, romantic relationship, family, hobbies, and health so well? It seems like people are balancing life so well (on social media lah, at least).
“I am afraid. Am I going to end my 20s just like this? Normal, insignificant? It’s funny how I used to think I’d have all the answers and wisdom by this age.”
He listed some ways he’s been learning to cope:
“(i) Define what ‘turning 30’ means for myself. Not what ‘turning 30’ means to my parents, some ‘successful’ influencers, or peers. Just me. How I see myself by 30. (*But it feels good to rant a bit!)
(ii) Cut my time on social media significantly (except for work). How others live their life has nothing to do with mine.
(iii) Work towards (i).
(iv) Learn to forgive myself (still learning!). Be grateful for every small or big progress in this journey.”
He ends his post with a favourite quote, “Remember that the minute you take your first step into the life of your dreams, the first to greet you there will be fear.”
“Nod. Keep walking.”