Often, the most challenging part of parenting is learning to choose the right words when speaking to your children
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Everything a parent does yields a strong psychological effect on the kids, and it is vital to remember that the way you choose to speak to them will act as a building block towards their personality.
As parents, there are times when unpleasant circumstances drive us to say things that we don’t really mean. However, we need to remember to keep our emotions under control and only say constructive things that are meant to teach kids the lessons they need to learn.
Here are some phrases that need to be shelved once and for all, with suggested alternatives on how to respond to the kids instead:
1. Instead of saying “Wait until Mum / Dad finds out about this!”…
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Try “Do you want to tell Mum / Dad, or should I explain it to him / her?”
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2. Instead of saying “You need to start watching what you eat!”
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Try “I know you like ice cream, but eating too much is not good for you.”
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3. Instead of saying “Why can’t you be more like your brother / sister?”…
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Remind your children that you love them equally the same, no matter what they do
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4. Instead of saying “Why did you do that?” (or even worse, “What were you thinking?”)…
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Try “What did you hope would happen? What will you do next time?”
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5. Instead of saying “Don’t talk back to me!”…
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Try “I know you want my answer to be different, but it will not change.”
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6. Instead of saying “Practice makes perfect”…
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Try “Wow, you worked really hard on that!”
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7. Instead of saying “Why didn’t you just say no?”
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Try “It’s tough to say no to a friend. Have you tried…?”
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8. Instead of saying “When I was your age”…
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Understand that things today are far different from your childhood all those years ago, making it difficult for children to relate to your experiences
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9. Instead of saying “Why are you so sensitive?”
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Try “I can see you’re upset. Do you want to talk about it?”
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